Twas the Night Before SpiceWorld



  • Written by the WONDERFUL and BRILLIANT Matt Stephenson! @PackMatt73

    Link:
    https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/twas-night-before-spiceworld-matt-stephenson

    Twas the night before Spiceworld, all thru the ATX. The datacenters were humming, optimized to their best.

    The VMs were spun up by the SysAmdin with care. It was the final Pepsi Challenge: KVM vs VMware

    The OGs were restless in their bright orange beds, with visions of irate Spiceheads rampaging thru their heads

    With me in my bow-tie, and Richard’s bright orange beard, soon to arrive and make Austin weird(er)

    When at the data center center there arose quite a ruckus. Oh No! It’s hackers from LizardSquad! They’re here to REDACTED us!

    The OGs were wondering how to give the data center immunity, when Sean shouted out “Call in the community!”

    The siren call went out to Heads of Spice and Guys of Green, who grabbed all their gear and converged on the scene. It was quite a mess, these hackers weren’t nice. But no job is too much for that man, the Chief Spice!

    “I need you Bud G and SQLRage, this thing isn’t going to get better with age! Dennis Kelley and Lenn, this attack is a killer! It looks like a job that needs Scott Alan Miller! If we can’t get this fixed, our company is done. Please put a call in to Huw3481! We need more we need more!” Chief Spice barked with a laugh… “get me the Reverend Doctor Paragraph. A last Spicehead is needed cuz this attack is mean, man… I think it would be prudent to bring in the Little Green Man!”

    The roster was assembled, the data center was a wreck. Then the Green Guys began arriving to say “what the heck?!?”

    “Fear not, Folks of Green!” Chief Spice bellowed quite loudly. “Francis and Jay and Greg did us quite proudly.”

    “Well, since we’re all here what should we do?” queried Nic from Webroot? They all looked perplexed till A.J. said “I am Groot!”

    What a great idea! Let’s all get together. Austin is beautiful regardless of weather. So they started the conference a bit early that night, after crushing those LizardSquad fiends in a one-sided fight.

    A gleeful shout from Alienvault Kate “What a nasty group! We pounded those suckers… but wait, we’re missing someone… where’s Katie Drucker?

    Then Ivan piped up “she’ll be here on Thursday, but can’t you read man? She got married last year, now it’s Katie Freedman!”

    Chief Spice looked around and his heart swelled with pride. The team had rallied to stop the hackers inside. The founders all smiled, practically bursting each kilt, they couldn’t be happier with this thing they had built.

    Then they piled into a Smart Car driven by Spice Rex. You’d be surprised how much can fit in one, despite the written specs.

    We heard them exclaim as they drove out of site

    “Happy Spiceworld to all and to all a good night!”



  • Note: the original has the links in it...


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