JB, did you take the new job offer of $30K more to the old employer and try to extort that higher level of pay out of them?
No, the wage came up during the meeting the president of the company called when I put in my (4 week) notice. He asked and I told him. I had no intention of ever taking any counter offer. I honestly did not expect one at the salary difference. That is probably why I was still shocked enough to get mad when they did.
Or, did you tell them the amount of the new offer to show them that in fact you were worth the money you were requesting all along
No. It was asked, I answered. I did not do it to prove anything.
and never had any intention of staying at the old company?
I was leaving. Period. I never had any intention of staying at that company after having been treated as I had been.
And most importantly, did the old employer understand just that, that you were in fact not trying to get them to give you a raise, but that you were simply informing them of your current value?
Who knows what they took away from the meeting.
I did end up giving them 5 weeks to put my termination date on the end of a payroll as well as in an attempt to give them time to hire someone prior to my departure for on boarding.