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    How to Answer Someone Who Doesn't Know Their Question

    Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved Water Closet
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    • scottalanmillerS
      scottalanmiller
      last edited by

      Did she explicitly agree to letting you have new access points on her network? You tend to not answer questions with a clear yes or no. I can't tell if she actually said this was okay and reneged or if she said you could have a router or something similar and you didn't actually get an access point approved.

      thanksajdotcomT 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
      • thanksajdotcomT
        thanksajdotcom @scottalanmiller
        last edited by

        @scottalanmiller said:

        Did she explicitly agree to letting you have new access points on her network? You tend to not answer questions with a clear yes or no. I can't tell if she actually said this was okay and reneged or if she said you could have a router or something similar and you didn't actually get an access point approved.

        When I set this all up, I informed them I was just piggybacking my router off theirs but that was just for internet access. My network would have its own network name, IP scheme, wireless, etc. I explained all that. Nothing was put in writing. I will say I discussed most of this with her husband though. So I suppose it's possible the message never got relayed.

        scottalanmillerS 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
        • scottalanmillerS
          scottalanmiller @thanksajdotcom
          last edited by

          @thanksajdotcom said:

          When I set this all up, I informed them I was just piggybacking my router off theirs but that was just for internet access. My network would have its own network name, IP scheme, wireless, etc. I explained all that. Nothing was put in writing. I will say I discussed most of this with her husband though. So I suppose it's possible the message never got relayed.

          If he really knew that there would be wireless (and approved) and she is going behind his back, then your issue is dealing with that. The technical aspects are easy to feel like they are involved, but it is about spouses who are not communicating or don't agree with each other and not about your actions.

          thanksajdotcomT 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
          • thanksajdotcomT
            thanksajdotcom @scottalanmiller
            last edited by

            @scottalanmiller said:

            @thanksajdotcom said:

            When I set this all up, I informed them I was just piggybacking my router off theirs but that was just for internet access. My network would have its own network name, IP scheme, wireless, etc. I explained all that. Nothing was put in writing. I will say I discussed most of this with her husband though. So I suppose it's possible the message never got relayed.

            If he really knew that there would be wireless (and approved) and she is going behind his back, then your issue is dealing with that. The technical aspects are easy to feel like they are involved, but it is about spouses who are not communicating or don't agree with each other and not about your actions.

            Yeah, he probably never told her and she's a weird duck as it is...then again, so is he...

            1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
            • ?
              A Former User
              last edited by A Former User

              Setting up Guest networks are against the Terms of most residential connections anyway.

              DashrenderD 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
              • ?
                A Former User
                last edited by

                @thanksajdotcom This is going to end badly. I think it's time to start looking for a new apartment. Your going to ruin a friendship over this.

                1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                • ?
                  A Former User @scottalanmiller
                  last edited by

                  @scottalanmiller said:

                  @thanksajdotcom said:

                  My router piggybacks off their router, but she knows that. Her husband knows that. I've had two of those exact networks up for over six weeks and she's never said anything...that's why I was confused. This wasn't a new thing. She just probably never noticed before.

                  So the answer to the above was an absolute yes and it's obvious why she is upset. What's unclear is why it isn't obvious to you why she is upset and why the answer to the above was a "yes". That it's been there for six weeks isn't a relevant factor, so no idea why that's being mentioned. She just figured out that you are adding access points to her network, now she is upset. Honestly, she is completely justified unless they agreed that you could do so.

                  That you have a router somewhere doesn't seem part of the equation. This is their network, you've added an access point to it. No wonder she is upset.

                  I think this is the biggest issue. An Open network that connects to anyone's network would make them upset. Especially since your router is after their's. This essential gives anyone all access to their LAN since to the router it would be considered part of the WAN. That's aside from the fact that just anyone could be wasting bandwidth.

                  thanksajdotcomT 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                  • ?
                    A Former User
                    last edited by

                    And remember if the wife isn't happy he isn't going to be happy.

                    1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                    • DashrenderD
                      Dashrender @A Former User
                      last edited by

                      @thecreativeone91 said:

                      Setting up Guest networks are against the Terms of most residential connections anyway.

                      Open and free to anyone guest networks are against more TOS, but a guest network for your invited guests are not.

                      thanksajdotcomT 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                      • T
                        Texkonc
                        last edited by

                        Whoever pays the bills makes the rules.

                        ? scottalanmillerS DashrenderD 3 Replies Last reply Reply Quote 1
                        • ?
                          A Former User @Texkonc
                          last edited by

                          @Texkonc said:

                          Whoever pays the bills makes the rules.

                          No truer wisdom here than that!

                          thanksajdotcomT 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                          • thanksajdotcomT
                            thanksajdotcom @A Former User
                            last edited by

                            @thecreativeone91 said:

                            @scottalanmiller said:

                            @thanksajdotcom said:

                            My router piggybacks off their router, but she knows that. Her husband knows that. I've had two of those exact networks up for over six weeks and she's never said anything...that's why I was confused. This wasn't a new thing. She just probably never noticed before.

                            So the answer to the above was an absolute yes and it's obvious why she is upset. What's unclear is why it isn't obvious to you why she is upset and why the answer to the above was a "yes". That it's been there for six weeks isn't a relevant factor, so no idea why that's being mentioned. She just figured out that you are adding access points to her network, now she is upset. Honestly, she is completely justified unless they agreed that you could do so.

                            That you have a router somewhere doesn't seem part of the equation. This is their network, you've added an access point to it. No wonder she is upset.

                            I think this is the biggest issue. An Open network that connects to anyone's network would make them upset. Especially since your router is after their's. This essential gives anyone all access to their LAN since to the router it would be considered part of the WAN. That's aside from the fact that just anyone could be wasting bandwidth.

                            My network isn't open. Not at all. My network is far more secure than theirs.

                            1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                            • thanksajdotcomT
                              thanksajdotcom @Dashrender
                              last edited by

                              @Dashrender said:

                              @thecreativeone91 said:

                              Setting up Guest networks are against the Terms of most residential connections anyway.

                              Open and free to anyone guest networks are against more TOS, but a guest network for your invited guests are not.

                              Nope, guest network was secured too.

                              1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                              • thanksajdotcomT
                                thanksajdotcom @A Former User
                                last edited by

                                @thecreativeone91 said:

                                @Texkonc said:

                                Whoever pays the bills makes the rules.

                                No truer wisdom here than that!

                                He pays the bills, not her.

                                ? 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                • ?
                                  A Former User @thanksajdotcom
                                  last edited by

                                  @thanksajdotcom said:

                                  @thecreativeone91 said:

                                  @Texkonc said:

                                  Whoever pays the bills makes the rules.

                                  No truer wisdom here than that!

                                  He pays the bills, not her.

                                  Doesn't matter. They are married. If he pays she does too.

                                  1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                                  • scottalanmillerS
                                    scottalanmiller @Texkonc
                                    last edited by

                                    @Texkonc said:

                                    Whoever pays the bills makes the rules.

                                    Never been married, I see 😉

                                    1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 2
                                    • T
                                      Texkonc
                                      last edited by

                                      Ok, I will clarify. Married couple makes the rules.
                                      If not, whoever pays the bills, makes the rules.

                                      coliverC 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                      • coliverC
                                        coliver @Texkonc
                                        last edited by

                                        @Texkonc said:

                                        Ok, I will clarify. Wives makes the rules.
                                        If not, whoever pays the bills, makes the rules.

                                        FTFY

                                        1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                                        • DashrenderD
                                          Dashrender @Texkonc
                                          last edited by

                                          @Texkonc said:

                                          Whoever pays the bills makes the rules.

                                          Of course I agree with you, though I'm guessing that AJ's internet access permission was between him and his friend, the wife probably wasn't part of it. So her getting all upset is really more a problem with her husband as Scott mentioned earlier.

                                          1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                          • ?
                                            A Former User
                                            last edited by A Former User

                                            Am I the only one that thinks this is going to end badly, with everyone having hurt feelings?

                                            Clearly the boundaries were not set, and if they were, there was a great misunderstanding.

                                            1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 2
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